hidden image

Bob’s Banter by Robert Clements Bring ‘Em Back..!

Robert Clements Robert Clements
30 Aug 2021

Most everyone the world over are wondering why Biden was in such a hurry to bring his American troops back, and since I make it a point whenever I’m in Washington, to get myself photographed outside the White House, I thought I’d take a chance and make a call to Biden, with the hope he’d recognize me from all the pics the secret service must have taken of me.
“Hi President!” I said cheerily, and if it wasn’t good ole Biden recognizing a much photographed me as he replied, “Hi Bob, I recognized you..”
“From the pics outside the White House,” I completed.
“White House? Nah,” said Biden sounding puzzled, “Aren’t you JFK’s brother?”
“Hey that’s another Robert,” I said easy like, “and he’s dead!”
“Sorry to hear that!” said Biden, “How did he die? Peacefully I hope?”
“Shot!” I said.
“Oh, poor chap, JFK must have taken it badly!”
“JFK’s also dead!” I said, “Anyway Mr President, just wanted to ask you something!”
“Shoot!” said Biden, “Oh no don’t, I don’t want to go the way Robert went!”
“Why did you bring your troops back so quickly. I’m sure you could have been a bit more practical!”
“Ah Bob, I never wanted to!”
“You didn’t?” I asked incredulously, “But they’ve all left and Afghanistan is now in the hands of the Taliban. Did the Vice-President give the orders? She does seem like a woman who likes doing her own thing!”
“Nah! Nah! Can’t blame Komaula!”
“It’s Kamala!” I said.
“You mean they’ve changed my VP?”
“No, it’s pronounced Kamala!”
“Whatever, she’s not to blame!”
“Then who?” I asked, knowing I was going to get a scoop.
“Well you know, I keep forgetting to put my dentures on when I come to the Oval room!”
“It happens!” I said.
“Yeah and at 79, you need them just to be understood!” said the President.
“So, you forgot to put them on while coming up!” I said impatiently.
“Yeah, and the missus, she be cleaning the bed and it went with the sheets to the laundry and she got a lil’ perturbed!”
“Your dentures went to the laundry!” I asked incredulously.
“Yeah, you seem to know ‘bout such things, you also wear them Bob?”
“Not yet!” I said, “Then what happened Mr President.
“Well, she picked up the phone and called me in the Oval office and asked what she should do and just then this Defense Secretary of mine Lloyd Austin, he calls me, and he asks, ‘What shall I do with the soldiers in Afghanistan Joe?’ You know Bob at my age, I just mixed up both the phones and shouted into his, “Bring em back..!”
Ah well, it’s good to know it’s not the President’s fault, even as he whispered to me, “I ‘haven’t got them dentures back yet Bob ..!”

bobsbanter@gmail.com   

Recent Posts

Gandhi's warning against "politics without principles" echoes today as wars, power struggles, and democratic erosion spread globally. From international conflicts to domestic electoral manipulation, c
apicture Jacob Peenikaparambil
16 Mar 2026
In Odisha's Sundargarh, tribal villagers are fighting in the Supreme Court to protect ancestral lands from mining expansion. Alleged violations of PESA and land laws threaten displacement, livelihoods
apicture John Dayal
16 Mar 2026
From Hiroshima and Nagasaki to modern wars and sanctions, a record of military dominance and unilateral "interventions" raises questions about moral authority, global policing, and the consequences of
apicture Dr. Elsa Lycias Joel
16 Mar 2026
A coalition of close to 30 civil society organisations, women's rights groups and constitutional rights advocates will hold a joint press conference on March 11, 2026, in Mumbai to express deep concer
apicture Joint Press Note
16 Mar 2026
The US–Israel attack on Iran is portrayed as part of a recurring pattern of military interventions justified by dubious claims. Such aggression, moral double standards, and geopolitical alignments ris
apicture Chhotebhai
16 Mar 2026
From Vietnam and Iran to Afghanistan and Iraq, a pattern of intervention driven by strategic and economic interests has shaped global conflicts. Such wars leave deep scars, reinforcing the reality tha
apicture Ram Puniyani
16 Mar 2026
Alberuni warned that India's wisdom lay buried under much rubbish, demanding careful selection. In today's rush to rewrite history through myths and epics, that caution is vital—especially when ideolo
apicture Thomas Menamparampil
16 Mar 2026
Your sixth stage Is polarisation, The pulling apart Of any threads That might still bind Victim and killer.
apicture Dr Suryaraju Mattimalla
16 Mar 2026
In war-torn Aden, four Missionaries of Charity Sisters were killed while serving the elderly, and their chaplain, Fr. Tom Uzhunnalil, was abducted. A decade later, their martyrdom and his survival rem
apicture CM Paul
16 Mar 2026
As we bite into bananas and papayas, let us also raise our voices against war. All wars. Every war. Because the moment war enters the kitchen, the dining table suddenly becomes a place of deep philoso
apicture Robert Clements
16 Mar 2026