hidden image

Bob’s Banter by Robert Clements Creating History, Through Fiction..!

Robert Clements Robert Clements
24 Apr 2023
“That our country won the first Olympics!” smiled the shorter man. I reluctantly took the notes, put off the online shopping site and started creating history..!”

The wife came bouncing into my study, where I pretended to write an article while actually looking longingly at some online shopping clothes, “There’s some government officials to see you!” she said.

“Oh no!” I said, “Have they come to arrest me?”

“They’re not cops,” she said, “I think they’re going to give you some award!”

“Award! Me!” I said, “Awards are only given to people with political contacts!”

I wandered into my sitting room, and watched as two obviously government officials, rose and extended their hands in my direction, “We are honoured to have you on board sir!”

“On board!” I said, “I’m quite happy where I am!”

“You have been chosen unanimously as the country’s new historian!”

“Whoa! Whoa!” I said, “I am not a historian, I’m a story teller! I write fiction!”

“Yes sir, all of us in the government have read your stories sir, and felt you were best suited for the job of rewriting our history!” said the shorter of the two officials, as he pulled out a sheet of papers and gave it to me.

“What is this?” I asked.

“Just an agreement saying you accept the post!”

“You are very kind gentlemen, but I have to refuse!”

“You will be offered a post equivalent to a ministerial one. You can have a red beacon for your car!”

“Lovely!” exclaimed the wife. “Would I be able to take it to the mall and kitty parties?”

“Of course madam!”

“We liked your article yesterday about our countryman already being on the moon, and welcoming Neil Armstrong there!”

“But that was just a work from my imagination!” I cried.

“We would like our history books to carry that story!” said the taller man, “All you have to do is to give it a date, just before the Americans landed!”

“A car with a red beacon!” sighed the wife.

“Our children also need some, fighting, some bloodshed and heroes,” said the shorter man, “So let us have the freedom struggle a little bloodied, with some of our present ministers being soldiers, even officers in the liberation army! You can even have a scene of these officers driving the British out of the country, singlehanded with their swords!”

“I can’t do that!” I said desperately, “It is absolutely fictitious!”

“That is why we have hired you!” said both the men as one pulled out his pen and offered it to me.

 “A car with a red beacon!” sighed the wife as I reluctantly took the pen and signed the agreement.

“This sir, is your first assignment!” said the tall man giving me some notes

“What is it?” I asked wearily.

“That our country won the first Olympics!” smiled the shorter man. I reluctantly took the notes, put off the online shopping site and started creating history..!”

bobsbanter@gmail.com

Recent Posts

A democracy must distinguish between an armed insurgent and a questioning citizen. Calling critics, students, academics or activists "Dimaagi Naxals" is unacceptable. Strength lies not in silencing di
apicture Dr Martin Valiyaparambil VC
24 Aug 2026
As I watched, I could not help remembering the interview I did with your father, NKP Salve, for Jain TV in the 1990s. Goswami, I presume, was then still "studying for some time in a Jesuit-run school,
apicture A. J. Philip
24 Aug 2026
After years in abeyance, Justice Sunday returns at a moment of profound national crisis. From poverty and exclusion to attacks on minorities and environmental destruction, the Church is called to recl
apicture Cedric Prakash
24 Aug 2026
Israel has transformed from the biblical David into a heavily armed Goliath. Self-defence cannot justify occupation, mass displacement and civilian suffering. The world must find the courage to act.
apicture P. A. Chacko
24 Aug 2026
Pellet guns were fired at protesting students, and nobody can say who ordered it. The issue has transcended one incident. Power remains concentrated, but responsibility is endlessly dispersed.
apicture Oliver D'Souza
24 Aug 2026
Beneath India's boasts of growth and power, a deeper restlessness is spreading. Jobs vanish, institutions weaken, citizens move, dissent is silenced, and trust collapses; the CJP's rise reflects this
apicture Thomas Menamparampil
24 Aug 2026
Sanatan borders bruised me In caste societies. Left Ideologies crushed me In European societies. Sharia societies Erased my skin.
apicture Dr Suryaraju Mattimalla
24 Aug 2026
Unity is beautiful, but only when united around what is right. Otherwise, unity merely allows everyone to become lost without feeling lonely.
apicture Robert Clements
24 Aug 2026
Bengal once welcomed missionaries who built schools, hospitals and presses, enriching the region's education, healthcare and reform. Today, priests are told to leave their parishes. The irony is devas
apicture CM Paul
17 Aug 2026
With Christians constituting barely 2.3 per cent of India's population, the charge of mass forced conversion defies logic. Yet anti-conversion laws pivot charity into "allurement," suspicion and crime
apicture Chhotebhai
17 Aug 2026