hidden image

Bob’s Banter by Robert Clements Jails, not Parliament..!

Robert Clements Robert Clements
27 Mar 2023
Bob’s Banter by Robert Clements Jails, not Parliament..!

The auditors of the country, who are very powerful people and oversee how public money is spent by the ones who govern, in my imagination, pursed their lips while the government official sat in front of them. “Sir,” said the first auditor, “there has been some very unwise spending on your part in building the new parliament building!”

“What are you saying?” screamed the government official jumping to his feet, then being told to sit down by his colleague, who gestured that auditors were very powerful people and could not be reasoned with threats or bullying, as he was used to doing. He sat down mollified, and asked in a whisper this time, “What are you saying?”

“Speak louder!” said the first auditor.

“I did, and you didn’t like it. What I said was, "What are you saying?”
The second auditor explained to him even more clearly what he had just said about too much money being spent on the new parliament building.  

“What are you saying?” asked the government official again, and then realizing he had already asked that question rephrased it saying, “You are saying we have spent too much money on the parliament building?”

“No sir, we are saying there was no need to spend any money on a new parliament at all!” said both the auditors together.

“Do you know who built the old building?” asked the government official, “The British! Do you want to sit in the same building where our previous rulers sat?”

“Sir,” said the second auditor, “Every bit of money in our country has to be spent wisely and prudently…”

“Because we are not a very rich country,” continued the first official.

“And if that same money could have been spent on something which is more necessary at the moment, then our job is to question you as to why the money wasn’t spent there.”    

“Sirs, where else can we show the world we are the biggest democracy? Where else can our men make glorious speeches, and use argument and debate over pressing issues, than in parliament?”

“True,” agreed the first auditor.

“Very, very true,” said the second auditor.

The government official smiled with self-satisfaction, and continued smugly, “Where else can the opposition speak against a motion, watched by the rest of the world?”

“Where is the opposition?” asked the first auditor quietly, “With many of them being put in jail, facing charges to be put in jail, or will soon find themselves in jail, don’t you think the old parliament building would have sufficed to hold the rest of the members?”

“And so,” said the second auditor even more firmly, “shouldn’t you have spent that same money on building more jails to house all the opposition?”

The official from the government looked at his hands. He had nothing to say..!

bobsbanter@gmail.com  

Recent Posts

From colonial opium to today's smartphones, India has perfected the art of numbing its youth. While neighbours topple governments through conviction and courage, our fatalism breeds a quietism that su
apicture A. J. Philip
08 Dec 2025
Across state and cultural frontiers, a new generation is redefining activism—mixing digital mobilisation with grassroots courage to defend land, identity and ecology. Their persistence shows that mean
apicture Pachu Menon
08 Dec 2025
A convention exposing nearly 5,000 attacks on Christians drew barely fifteen hundred people—yet concerts pack stadiums. If we can gather for spectacle but not for suffering, our witness is fractured.
apicture Vijayesh Lal
08 Dec 2025
Leadership training empowers children with discipline, confidence, and clarity of vision. Through inclusive learning, social awareness, and value-based activities, they learn to respect diversity, exp
apicture Jacob Peenikaparambil
08 Dec 2025
The Kamalesan case reveals how inherited colonial structures continue to shape the Army's religious practices. By prioritising ritual conformity over constitutional freedom, the forces risk underminin
apicture Oliver D'Souza
08 Dec 2025
Zohran Mamdani's rise in New York exposes a bitter truth: a Muslim idealist can inspire America, yet would be unthinkable in today's India, where Hindutva politics has normalised bigotry and rendered
apicture Mathew John
08 Dec 2025
Climate change is now a daily classroom disruptor, pushing the already precariously perched crores of Indian children—especially girls and those in vulnerable regions—out of learning. Unless resilient
apicture Jaswant Kaur
08 Dec 2025
The ideas sown in classrooms today will shape the country tomorrow. India must decide whether it wants citizens who can think, question, and understand—or citizens trained only to conform. The choice
apicture Fr Soroj Mullick, SDB
08 Dec 2025
In your Jasmine hall, I landed Hoping to find refuge, to be free, and sleep, But all I met were your stares, sharp, cold, and protesting.
apicture Dr Suryaraju Mattimalla
08 Dec 2025
Children are either obedient or disobedient. If they are obedient, we treat them as our slaves. And if they are rebellious, we wash our hands of them. Our mind, too, is like a child, and children are
apicture P. Raja
08 Dec 2025