hidden image

Bob’s Banter by Robert Clements Jails, not Parliament..!

Robert Clements Robert Clements
27 Mar 2023
Bob’s Banter by Robert Clements Jails, not Parliament..!

The auditors of the country, who are very powerful people and oversee how public money is spent by the ones who govern, in my imagination, pursed their lips while the government official sat in front of them. “Sir,” said the first auditor, “there has been some very unwise spending on your part in building the new parliament building!”

“What are you saying?” screamed the government official jumping to his feet, then being told to sit down by his colleague, who gestured that auditors were very powerful people and could not be reasoned with threats or bullying, as he was used to doing. He sat down mollified, and asked in a whisper this time, “What are you saying?”

“Speak louder!” said the first auditor.

“I did, and you didn’t like it. What I said was, "What are you saying?”
The second auditor explained to him even more clearly what he had just said about too much money being spent on the new parliament building.  

“What are you saying?” asked the government official again, and then realizing he had already asked that question rephrased it saying, “You are saying we have spent too much money on the parliament building?”

“No sir, we are saying there was no need to spend any money on a new parliament at all!” said both the auditors together.

“Do you know who built the old building?” asked the government official, “The British! Do you want to sit in the same building where our previous rulers sat?”

“Sir,” said the second auditor, “Every bit of money in our country has to be spent wisely and prudently…”

“Because we are not a very rich country,” continued the first official.

“And if that same money could have been spent on something which is more necessary at the moment, then our job is to question you as to why the money wasn’t spent there.”    

“Sirs, where else can we show the world we are the biggest democracy? Where else can our men make glorious speeches, and use argument and debate over pressing issues, than in parliament?”

“True,” agreed the first auditor.

“Very, very true,” said the second auditor.

The government official smiled with self-satisfaction, and continued smugly, “Where else can the opposition speak against a motion, watched by the rest of the world?”

“Where is the opposition?” asked the first auditor quietly, “With many of them being put in jail, facing charges to be put in jail, or will soon find themselves in jail, don’t you think the old parliament building would have sufficed to hold the rest of the members?”

“And so,” said the second auditor even more firmly, “shouldn’t you have spent that same money on building more jails to house all the opposition?”

The official from the government looked at his hands. He had nothing to say..!

bobsbanter@gmail.com  

Recent Posts

As China powers ahead with trillion-dollar trade surpluses and futuristic innovation, India drifts into culture wars and symbolic debates. Shrinking parliamentary scrutiny and political distraction ar
apicture A. J. Philip
15 Dec 2025
The rapacity for tribal land and violation of tribal autonomy are being masked by the Hindutva forces as a battle for personhood. Adivasi Christians face assaults, expulsions, and judicial indifferenc
apicture John Dayal
15 Dec 2025
The IndiGo meltdown exposes the more profound crises developing in India. We are drifting toward monopoly economics, where regulators just blink, corporations bully, and citizens pay. If essential sec
apicture Jacob Peenikaparambil
15 Dec 2025
India's democratic foundations—rooted in rights, modern education and egalitarian ideals—are being reshaped as Hindutva politics elevates duties over freedoms. Modi's rhetoric signals a shift from con
apicture Ram Puniyani
15 Dec 2025
When a woman leads, we expect her to do wonders and that her presence alone will solve the problems she inherits. At the very least, we expect her to understand women's anxieties, respond with empathy
apicture Jaswant Kaur
15 Dec 2025
In the cold, unforgiving silence of the prison cell, Keshav—once defined by his crime—now holds a driver's license, a key to a new life, and a quiet smile. This subtle yet profound transformation is t
apicture CM Paul
15 Dec 2025
As Hindutva leaders rewrite identity and weaponise myth, minorities remain loyal while being vilified—and lakhs of Hindus themselves flee the stifling culture imposed in their name. A nation built on
apicture Thomas Menamparampil
15 Dec 2025
O Sanatan, the walls of your temple ring with my suffering, Not with words, not with deeds, but with each inch of my flesh that has your stain upon it. I am the Pariah, branded at birth, a curse wri
apicture Dr Suryaraju Mattimalla
15 Dec 2025
This year has shown us that dishonesty walks confidently through the front doors of our institutions. Chanakya's cleverness is praised. Cheating is normalised. Those who take shortcuts are applauded f
apicture Robert Clements
15 Dec 2025
From colonial opium to today's smartphones, India has perfected the art of numbing its youth. While neighbours topple governments through conviction and courage, our fatalism breeds a quietism that su
apicture A. J. Philip
08 Dec 2025