hidden image

Bob’s Banter by Robert Clements Vaccine-Grat-20..!

Robert Clements Robert Clements
30 Nov 2020

My neighbour Ramkumar, suddenly appeared in the next balcony of my building and gave me a big smile, “Bob, I’ve discovered a vaccine the world needs at this moment!”

“Whoa! Whoa!” I shouted, “You’ve just recovered from the coronavirus, not only you, but your whole family. Is that what you were doing while being quarantined? Becoming a scientist?”

“Not exactly,” he said with good humour, tolerating my banter, which normally he treated with a scowl, “It was after we went through the trauma, and came out more or less unscathed, I discovered the vaccine!”

“Did your wife and children also help you in your research?” I asked pleasantly.

“As a matter of fact, yes!” replied my neighbour.

I watched as his wife came onto the balcony and asked where my missus was, “I need to share a non-veg recipe with her!”

“But you are vegetarians!” I said.

“So, nothing wrong in sharing with others who eat non-veg even if we don’t!” she said, and grinned.

Meanwhile my neighbour brought out a chair and stretched himself out, “Now do you know what vaccine I’ve discovered?” he asked, “It’s a vaccine called Gratitude!”

“I’ve heard of Sputnik and Oxford and Pfizer but this is a strange name,” I said, “You should call it Grat-20 or something like that for the world to take you seriously!”

“The world should take me seriously,” said Ramkumar, “because if it doesn’t we are all going to perish with this new virus going around. A virus called ‘Hate’!”

“And how exactly will your vaccine of Gratitude counteract the effects of Hate?” I asked, as I saw his wife exchanging the recipe with my wife.

“Gratitude,” said my neighbour, “Is what all those who are alive today after the virus scare should be having! Gratitude for life! And instead of going back to the old state of Hate, which had resulted in polarization and conflict before the virus appeared, let us use this same Gratitude to vaccinate ourselves against another relapse into that previous pandemic!”

“We are so happy to be alive,” smiled his wife, “that I can’t believe I had never spoken to your wife before, just because she ate or worshipped differently! Imagine, I could have been carried to the funeral pyre without knowing what a lovely person she was!”

“Let us inject ourselves with Gratitude!” shouted Ramkumar’s family together.

We chatted on, and I watched a man who couldn’t stand me or my jokes now listening to them, guffawing and chuckling. And as I heard him speak, I realized he had indeed discovered a much-needed cure, the Vaccine of Gratitude!

“Okay call it Grat-20!” said Ramkumar benevolently, “Though this time, I doubt the government will help in its distribution..!”

bobsbanter@gmail.com
 

Recent Posts

It is not surprising that India has been lukewarm to Pope Leo XIV's Encyclical on Artificial Intelligence. The Pope has warned that Artificial Intelligence threatens to normalise an "anti-human vision
apicture John Dayal
01 Jun 2026
What began as a "special revision" of electoral rolls has evolved into something far more unsettling: a test of who truly belongs in the Republic. By upholding the Election Commission's powers while o
apicture A. J. Philip
01 Jun 2026
Two newly elected governments, two sharply different visions of India. While West Bengal's new BJP regime signals majoritarian assertion and ideological confrontation, Kerala's UDF government projects
apicture Jacob Peenikaparambil
01 Jun 2026
As concern for climate change and environmental destruction grows, the deeper crisis of "human ecology" is often ignored. From family breakdown to abortion and demographic imbalance, the defence of hu
apicture Bp Gerald John Mathias
01 Jun 2026
A movement born from mockery of unemployed youth now commands millions, headlines, and political panic. But beneath the cockroach memes and anti-establishment spectacle lies a deeper question haunting
apicture Oliver D'Souza
01 Jun 2026
India's rise cannot be measured by GDP, expressways, or digital ambition alone. A Republic becomes truly developed only when constitutional promises translate into dignity, employment, equality, justi
apicture Jaswant Kaur
01 Jun 2026
"If an untouchable marries a non-Dalit girl, then he must be put to death. If untouchable commits adultery with a Hindu woman, then he is to be burned alive" (Matsya Purana, 227.131; Vaishtha Grhyasut
apicture Dr Suryaraju Mattimalla
01 Jun 2026
My lifelong passion is cricket, and in more recent times, the political world has become an obsession, not joyful as with cricket, but born of a profound anxiety about the state of the world. Given su
apicture Mathew John
01 Jun 2026
The saddest part is that twenty-two lakh students studied honestly. Millions of parents worried honestly. Teachers taught honestly. Yet a handful of dishonest people have managed to drag one of the co
apicture Robert Clements
01 Jun 2026
India's political summer is witnessing impulsive governance, bulldozer crackdowns, and inflammatory rhetoric symbolised by "cockroaches." From hurried populism to selective demolitions and anti-minori
apicture Julian S Das
25 May 2026