hidden image

Bobs Banter by Robert Clements New Bridge Across The River..!

Robert Clements Robert Clements
25 Jul 2022
Bridge collapse incidents due to heavy rains

Even as I hear plans of bullet trains, and highways, and coastal roads and flyovers I look at bridges built yesterday, inaugurated with much fanfare that are already crumbling, while old British ones stand the test of time, even having a laugh while they see their new unfortunate cousins collapsing under a heavy torrent or flood, for which the taxpaying citizens were told, they were made to withstand.

But as soon as the new one shows signs of wear and tear, comes an ever-eager minister to the rescue:

“We need to build another bridge across the river!" says the minister to his people while visiting his constituency, looking at the old bridge, and smiles as they clap and applaud.

"How much?" asks the minister, later in his office.

"Well sir it will cost you…" says the contractor.

"How much?" smiles the minister.

"How much?" asks the contractor.

"Yes how much?" says the minister.

"Ten percent?"

"Too little!"

"Twenty five percent!"

"You may start the work!"

"How much?" asks government engineer when contractor does half the work and asks for payment for his bills.

"Well sir I have finished half so it comes to.."

"How much?" asks the engineer.

"Ten percent!"

"Ten percent?"

"Fifteen!"

"How much?” asks the clerk in the accountancy department.

"Sir, the engineer has specified the work is complete."

"How much?"

"Ten percent!"

"Ten percent?"

"Twenty!"

"Please pass the cheque for sahib's signature!"

"How much?" asks sahib.

"Ten percent!"

"How much?"

"Twenty-five!"

And the bridge is built.

"Did you make any profit?" asks the wife of the contractor as they drive for dinner in his Mercedes.

"Of course I did, what I gave in commissions I took back from the bridge! Instead of cement, sand. The bricks, half- baked. The steel, not moisture resistant. Instead of an engineer I used your brother on the site, instead of masons I used unskilled labour!"

"But if the bridge collapses?"

"There will be an enquiry," smiles the contractor, "and the man in charge of the enquiry will ask.."

"How much?" grins his wife then looks at her husband curiously, "Why are we taking the long route home?"

"You crazy?" asks the contractor as he passes the cars of the minister and the engineer and clerk, all taking the long route home, "You think any one of us will risk our lives on that bridge? That bridge is for the common man!"

And in another constituency, the common man claps and applauds again as a minister says, "We need a bridge across the river!"

Or maybe it’s metros, bullet trains, concreting roads, highways .. you name it! And you thought it’s because of some ideology they believe in that they topple each other’s governments? Nah, it’s just to topple you into the river..!

bobsbanter@gmail.com

Recent Posts

GRAMG replaces a constitutional right with a capped dole. It seeks to shift costs to poorer states, punish those states where the BJP doesn't rule, centralise power in Delhi, and convert demand-driven
apicture Joseph Maliakan
22 Dec 2025
The Modi government, even in its 12th year, is on a name-changing spree, including that of MGNREGA, trying to erase the legacy of the Congress-era projects.
apicture Dr Suresh Mathew
22 Dec 2025
Gandhi is garlanded, branded and renamed into oblivion, while his ideas are quietly dismantled. Hindutva venerates his image abroad and empties his legacy at home. It is consistently replacing moral c
apicture A. J. Philip
22 Dec 2025
Christmas is celebrated everywhere, sold endlessly, and consumed noisily—yet its soul is simple: God in every human being. Beyond markets, rituals and identities, Christmas calls us to choose humanity
apicture Jacob Peenikaparambil
22 Dec 2025
When God, our Creator, created the world, the Holy Bible tells us he said, "Let there be Light... sky, water, earth, fish, animals..." He finally created man (Adam and Eve). Looking from above, he tel
apicture Cedric Prakash
22 Dec 2025
We are still taking censuses, still building walls, still deciding who belongs. And Christmas still comes every year, quietly asking if we have left any room, if we are willing to see God in unexpecte
apicture Dr John Singarayar
22 Dec 2025
Periyar, you preached reason and self-respect, You fought caste, oppression, and Brahminical dominance. You challenged the sacred scriptures, the rituals of the oppressors, You raised your voice fo
apicture Dr Suryaraju Mattimalla
22 Dec 2025
Hindon airport shows how no-frills regional hubs can democratise flying. As aviation booms, India must back low-cost airports and diversified infrastructure, not metro congestion and monopolies, if af
apicture Pachu Menon
22 Dec 2025
India bankrolls rivals through dependence, brandishes self-reliance as a slogan, humiliates neighbours and minorities alike, and mistakes bravado for strength. History warns that nations weakened by r
apicture Thomas Menamparampil
22 Dec 2025
Climate change is hitting India hardest—weakening agriculture, deepening poverty, worsening health risks, and driving unsafe urban migration. Building resilience, enforcing climate justice, and aligni
apicture Fr. John Felix Raj & Prabhat Kumar Datta
22 Dec 2025