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Legal, Official, Bribery!

Robert Clements Robert Clements
02 Dec 2024

There's a new type of bribery in our nation: the legal, official bribe!

We've just seen this in the Maharashtra elections where women were promised one thousand five hundred rupees per month by a party.

The party won, and the people are jubilant, thinking they have a bonus in their pocket, but it's your very own money, dear friend, your own taxes!

Your Airline Surcharge tax, Accounts Receivable Tax, Airline Fuel Tax, Airport Maintenance Tax, Building Permit Tax, Cigarette Tax, Corporate Income Tax, Death Tax, Dog License Tax, Driving Permit Tax, Excise Tax, Income Tax, Professional Tax, Industry Tax, Food License Tax, Petrol Tax, Octroi Tax, Health Tax, Hunting License Tax, Wealth Tax.

Inheritance Tax, Interest Tax, Liquor Tax, Luxury Taxes, Marriage License Tax, Medicare Tax, Mortgage Tax, Personal Income Tax, Property Tax, Poverty Tax, Drug Tax, Provincial Income Tax, Real Estate Tax, Recreational Vehicle Tax, Retail Sales Tax, Service Charge Tax, Educational Tax, Telephone Tax, Provincial and Local Surcharge Taxes, Telephone Minimum Usage Surcharge Tax, Vehicle License Registration Tax, Vehicle Sales Tax, Water Tax, Road Tax, Well Permit Tax, Workers Compensation Tax.

Rice and TV's with your tax money, ha, ha, ha!

And how do they do it? Ah well! Since you insist, here's how:

They tax your land, tax your bed, and the table at which you're fed.

Tax your tractor, tax your mule and tell you taxes are the rule.

Tax your work, tax your pay, you work for peanuts anyway!

Tax your cow, tax your goat, tax your pants and tax your coat.

Tax your ties, tax your work, even tax your unwanted dirt.

Tax your tobacco, tax your drink, tax you, dare you try to think.

Tax your cigars, tax your beers, If you cry, they even tax your tears.

Tax your car, tax your gas, tax the mountain and the pass.

Tax, tax, tax, then let you know, you won't be done till you have no dough.

When you scream they tax you more, tax you till you're good and sore.

Then tax your coffin, tax your grave, tax the ground in which you're laid.

Then put these words upon your tomb: 'Taxes drove him to his doom!'

When you're gone, don't relax; your wife's to shell out inheritance tax!

So, if you ever wonder why our roads are terrible and we take years to build a bridge, remember that money that should have been used for your welfare was spent on freebies to buy votes to keep politicians in power!

So when rice and wheat are rupees two, and TVs given free

Remember, they're the taxes that are paid by you and me

Your taxes buy that TV or subsidise that rice

Your taxes are now bribery in camouflaged disguise..!

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