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Passing the Laughter Test!

Robert Clements Robert Clements
14 Apr 2025

Before being elected, politicians should be made to attend a special school. Not one where economics and politics are taught—no, sir! —but one where they're taught to laugh at themselves! Yes, I'm talking about good old belly-shaking, ego-deflating, humility-inducing laughter—at themselves!

Imagine, if you will, a classroom full of aspiring politicians, each with paunches that arrive a full two seconds before the rest of their body. The instructor—a sharp-tongued ex-stand-up comedian, who's done his jail time because of one of them—points to one particularly round legislator and says, "Sir, you look like the national emblem has swallowed a globe!"
Everyone laughs, including the globe himself. Lesson one: laugh at your shape before the cartoonists do it for you.

Next subject: Floor Crossing. A little skit is enacted. A politician walks in from the left, switches to the right, and then moonwalks to the centre before flipping back to the left. The crowd howls. "I call this the 'democracy dance,'" the instructor says. "Learn to laugh at yourself when you do it—because the people certainly are!"

Bribery class is next: "Students, reach under your desks," the teacher instructs. They do—and find fake currency bundles with 'For chai-biscuit expenses only' printed on them. "Good! Now laugh—because if you think people believe that note was for snacks, you're the joke!"

Then comes the Leadership segment. The projector shows images of them arriving at flood-hit areas in spotless white clothes, flanked by six umbrella holders and twenty photographers. "What are you, Bollywood stars or public servants?" the instructor booms. "Maharajas in monsoon?" The students chuckle. Lesson? Learn to laugh at yourself before the voters do... at the ballot box.

Constitutional Literacy follows. Candidates are handed copies of the Constitution. "Now turn to Article... oh wait, sorry, my fault in not telling you—you thought the Constitution was a menu?" More laughter. "No, you cannot order 'Fundamental Rights' with extra gravy and no dissent."

A particularly sensitive class: Women's Empowerment. "Hands up if you've ever used the word 'empowerment' in a speech?" All hands shoot up. "And now, hands up if you let your wife pick her own clothes without asking you first." Dead silence. "Exactly! Empowerment begins at home. Learn to laugh at your hypocrisy before someone pokes fun at you on a comedy show."

Finally, the Graduation Exam—The Laughter Test. They're shown a video collection of their past blunders: mispronounced names, lack of knowledge, backward maps, and microphones left on during private conversations- They must laugh genuinely. If they squirm, cringe, or call for a press ban—they fail.

Only those who pass the Laughter Test get a ministry berth. Why? Because if you can't laugh at yourself, you'll never understand the joke, democracy sometimes makes of power.

Or worse, dear sir—you'll never know that the joke... is on you…!
 

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