hidden image

Bobs Banter by Robert Clements New Bridge Across The River..!

Robert Clements Robert Clements
25 Jul 2022
Bridge collapse incidents due to heavy rains

Even as I hear plans of bullet trains, and highways, and coastal roads and flyovers I look at bridges built yesterday, inaugurated with much fanfare that are already crumbling, while old British ones stand the test of time, even having a laugh while they see their new unfortunate cousins collapsing under a heavy torrent or flood, for which the taxpaying citizens were told, they were made to withstand.

But as soon as the new one shows signs of wear and tear, comes an ever-eager minister to the rescue:

“We need to build another bridge across the river!" says the minister to his people while visiting his constituency, looking at the old bridge, and smiles as they clap and applaud.

"How much?" asks the minister, later in his office.

"Well sir it will cost you…" says the contractor.

"How much?" smiles the minister.

"How much?" asks the contractor.

"Yes how much?" says the minister.

"Ten percent?"

"Too little!"

"Twenty five percent!"

"You may start the work!"

"How much?" asks government engineer when contractor does half the work and asks for payment for his bills.

"Well sir I have finished half so it comes to.."

"How much?" asks the engineer.

"Ten percent!"

"Ten percent?"

"Fifteen!"

"How much?” asks the clerk in the accountancy department.

"Sir, the engineer has specified the work is complete."

"How much?"

"Ten percent!"

"Ten percent?"

"Twenty!"

"Please pass the cheque for sahib's signature!"

"How much?" asks sahib.

"Ten percent!"

"How much?"

"Twenty-five!"

And the bridge is built.

"Did you make any profit?" asks the wife of the contractor as they drive for dinner in his Mercedes.

"Of course I did, what I gave in commissions I took back from the bridge! Instead of cement, sand. The bricks, half- baked. The steel, not moisture resistant. Instead of an engineer I used your brother on the site, instead of masons I used unskilled labour!"

"But if the bridge collapses?"

"There will be an enquiry," smiles the contractor, "and the man in charge of the enquiry will ask.."

"How much?" grins his wife then looks at her husband curiously, "Why are we taking the long route home?"

"You crazy?" asks the contractor as he passes the cars of the minister and the engineer and clerk, all taking the long route home, "You think any one of us will risk our lives on that bridge? That bridge is for the common man!"

And in another constituency, the common man claps and applauds again as a minister says, "We need a bridge across the river!"

Or maybe it’s metros, bullet trains, concreting roads, highways .. you name it! And you thought it’s because of some ideology they believe in that they topple each other’s governments? Nah, it’s just to topple you into the river..!

bobsbanter@gmail.com

Recent Posts

In an era when faith is often kept carefully outside the public square, VD Satheesan, Leader of the Opposition in the Kerala Legislative Assembly, speaks of the Bible with an ease that is neither perf
apicture Dr Suresh Mathew
29 Dec 2025
For seventy years, Christmas felt benign. This year, people were wishing each other a "safe" Christmas. That single adjective reveals India's moral crisis. Mobs rule, and symbolism has replaced govern
apicture A. J. Philip
29 Dec 2025
Festivals once nurtured harmony; today, they are weaponised. Hate, boycotts, and violence have replaced pluralism, enabled by silence from power and an ideology hostile to India's constitutional promi
apicture Jacob Peenikaparambil
29 Dec 2025
As the new year dawns, India pauses to introspect—except its institutions. Data reveals a justice system dulled by delay, selective mercy, and unequal enforcement, where survivors wait, the powerful w
apicture Jaswant Kaur
29 Dec 2025
On December 15, 2025, in Kanker district, Chhattisgarh, a province in the central part of India, the father of Rajman Salam, an elected sarpanch (village headman), was buried according to Christian ri
apicture United Christian Forum
29 Dec 2025
Renaming the Mahatma Gandhi National Rural Employment Guarantee Act (MGNREGA) into the Viksit Bharat Guarantee for Employment and Livelihood Mission (Rural) Bill, dubbed "G RAM G" and pushed through P
apicture Oliver D'Souza
29 Dec 2025
In the land of Tagore, Vivekananda, and Gandhi—who preached universal faith and freedom—religion is now weaponised. Constitutional guarantees are undermined by vigilantes, anti-conversion laws, and si
apicture John S. Shilshi
29 Dec 2025
In the thundering storm of ignorance and fear, Rose a voice, fierce and clear-Periyar, the seer. A flame against the darkness, a sword against the lie, He challenged the shadows that veiled the sky
apicture Dr Suryaraju Mattimalla
29 Dec 2025
Christmas celebrations in Arunachal grew into vibrant expressions of faith and culture. Today, they are celebrated widely across the state, but their roots trace back to that fragile, defiant begin
apicture CM Paul
29 Dec 2025
The Lord Jesus has promised that the stones will cry out. What remains to be decided—by me, by my Order, by the Church in India—is whether we will raise our voices with them, or whether our silence wi
apicture Fr. Anil Prakash D'Souza, OP
29 Dec 2025